Saturday, January 21, 2017

Quote of the Day

The child who has paid the price of shutting down the feelings of hurt and pain is the adult who remains hostage to the blackmail of his defense mechanisms.  The ransom is the damage that our defenses do to others or ourselves.  For example, we may regularly displace or project our feelings onto others, or instead internalize our feelings causing a depletion of confidence and energy for life.  Perhaps our unacknowledged feelings manifest themselves in the form of chronic irritability, depression, or a negative outlook.

-- Eleanor D. Payson, The Wizard of Oz and Other Narcissists, p. 83

Friday, January 20, 2017

Quote of the Day

Social attitudes oftentimes take generations to change.  But if our democracy is to work in this increasingly diverse nation, then each one of us need to try to heed the advice of a great character in American fiction -- Atticus Finch -- who said "You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view...until you climb into his skin and walk around in it." ... For white Americans, it means acknowledging that the effects of slavery and Jim Crow didn't suddenly vanish in the '60s [and] that when minority groups voice discontent, they're not just engaging in reverse racism or practicing political correctness.  When they wage peaceful protest, they're not demanding special treatment but the equal treatment that our Founders promised.

-- President Barack Obama, Farewell Address

Thursday, January 19, 2017

Quote of the Day

Whenever we lack empathy for our children or someone else (provided we acknowledge it), we can begin to recognize that we are in close proximity to a deeper connection with our own childhood wounding.

-- Eleanor D. Payson, The Wizard of Oz and Other Narcissists, p. 83

Wednesday, January 18, 2017

Quote of the Day

Social attitudes oftentimes take generations to change.  But if our democracy is to work in this increasingly diverse nation, then each one of us need to try to heed the advice of a great character in American fiction -- Atticus Finch -- who said "You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view...until you climb into his skin and walk around in it."  For blacks and other minority groups, it means tying our own very real struggles for justice to the challenges that a lot of people in this country face -- not only the refugee, or the immigrant, or the rural poor, or the transgender American, but also the middle-aged white guy who, from the outside, may seem like he's got advantages, but has seen his world upended by economic and cultural and technological change.  We have to pay attention, and listen.

-- President Barack Obama, Farewell Address

Tuesday, January 17, 2017

Quote of the Day

Because I am so often dismayed by the endlessly creative efforts that friends, family members, and clients use to circumvent this imperative healing process, I am compelled to state that this resistance is our own worst enemy.  In fact, our resistance to journey more deeply into ourselves lies at the very heart of our arrested growth.  This resistance to explore our inner emotions is primarily due to our fear and reluctance to face feelings that at one time in our life were so overwhelming and painful that we developed defenses to protect us from even knowing they exist.

-- Eleanor D. Payson, The Wizard of Oz and Other Narcissists, p. 80

Monday, January 16, 2017

Quote of the Day

The challenge will be a steep one for journalists and for all Americans, when so much of what comes from the next president has to checked and double-checked.  The first step is to establish when there is a gaslighting operation in progress.  Then comes the battle to hold on to the facts.
 
-- Frida Ghitis, "Donald Trump is 'gaslighting' all of us"

Sunday, January 15, 2017

Quote of the Day

Pain is often the unwelcome herald of needed change.  Pain also insists that this change be given the attention it deserves, which is generally far more than we want to acknowledge.

-- Eleanor D. Payson, The Wizard of Oz and Other Narcissists, p. 79