Men are cultured to feel ownership over their female children. That's why dudes say things like "As a father of a daughter..." to start off their contribution to a conversation about basic human dignity for people who happen to be women. Men aren't taught to empathize with us, but to protect us as extensions of themselves. We are seen in relation or relief, rather than as distinct autonomous individuals. Living in a patriarchal society means fathers view daughters as an offering, as a good to trade to other men as a way of improving one's position. That's the history of marriage. I'd been very high achieving, which meant that my dad was a success with a solid prize to offer mankind -- and my rejecting men [because I was gay] was a rejection of his value. Not that he has ever spoken to me about any of this or made me feel it directly. It's the dang water, man. It's the system.
-- Cameron Esposito, Save Yourself, p. 99
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