Quote of the Day

Songs are safe places where the vulnerable truth can be spoken.

-- Linford Detweiler

Quote of the Day

The development of empathy is the core issue in your relationship with your narcissistic partner because it is empathy that has been sacrificed in the adoption of the "false self."

-- Eleanor D. Payson, The Wizard of Oz and Other Narcissists, p. 131

Quote of the Day

Empathy (which is the ability to emotionally understand and or connect with another person) is the ability that is lacking for the narcissistic individual.  Because the only way to truly change and heal this problem is to rediscover and claim the cut-off feelings from childhood, all other avenues of attempting to restore empathy will generally be superficial.  Just offering a set of instructions to the partner on how to behave empathically would not only be a temporary fix, but potentially another re-enactment of childhood wounding because a partner may feel that he or she is only pretending all over again.

-- Eleanor D. Payson, The Wizard of Oz and Other Narcissists, p. 131

Quote of the Day

One remarkable advantage to couple's therapy is that the struggles between you and your partner point the way like an arrow to the otherwise cryptic and forgotten history of your childhood.  Developing insight into your own childhood wounding can be much easier to accomplish in the forum of couple's therapy.

-- Eleanor D. Payson, The Wizard of Oz and Other Narcissists, p. 130

Quote of the Day

The discovery of your own truth offers the leverage and capability you have always had but didn't know -- the power to resolve your struggle and find peace.

-- Eleanor D. Payson, The Wizard of Oz and Other Narcissists, p. 122

Quote of the Day

We are here and around the world for a deep democracy that says we will not be quiet, we will not be controlled, we will work for a world in which all countries are connected.  God may be in the details, but the goddess is in connections.  We are at one with each other, we are looking at each other, not up.  No more asking daddy.

-- Gloria Steinem, Women's March on Washington D.C.

Quote of the Day

I believe that the free expression of resentment against one's parents represents a great opportunity.  It provides access to one's true self, reactivates numbed feelings, opens that way for mourning and...with luck...reconciliation.  In any case, it is an essential part of the process of psychic healing.

-- Alice Miller, For Your Own Good

Quote of the Day

Until we can acknowledge our feelings with honesty, we cannot assert with confidence our perception of what is false in another person, especially the false self of our partner.

-- Eleanor D. Payson, The Wizard of Oz and Other Narcissists, p. 122

Quote of the Day

To be free to express resentment dating back to early childhood does not mean that one now becomes a resentful person, but rather the exact opposite.

-- Alice Miller, For Your Own Good

Quote of the Day

Coming on his first full day in office, Trump's 15-minute talk was delivered as he stood before the Wall of Stars that memorializes CIA agents killed in action.  It's hard to imagine that anyone could occupy this spot and speak with so little regard to accuracy and truth.  However, this is Donald Trump, and he didn't get where he is by exercising care, precision and restraint.

-- Michael D'Antonio, "Lying has worked for Donald Trump -- so why stop now?"

Quote of the Day

Even when a narcissistic parent demonstrates the inability for insight, he is capable of learning (over time) that the ground rules for interacting with you have changed.  He is able to learn that he must curb his inappropriate behaviors.

-- Eleanor D. Payson, The Wizard of Oz and Other Narcissists, p. 94

Quote of the Day

The day after his inaugural address, Trump -- in a speech to the CIA -- denied ample photographic evidence, insisting that his swearing in was in fact attended by a crowd that "looked like a million, a million and a half people."  He then recruited the Almighty to aid the lie, saying heaven had stopped the rain from falling when he spoke -- "and then it became really sunny."  It rained throughout.

-- Michael D'Antonio, "Lying has worked for Donald Trump -- so why stop now?"