The child who has paid the price of shutting down the feelings of hurt and pain is the adult who remains hostage to the blackmail of his defense mechanisms. The ransom is the damage that our defenses do to others or ourselves. For example, we may regularly displace or project our feelings onto others, or instead internalize our feelings causing a depletion of confidence and energy for life. Perhaps our unacknowledged feelings manifest themselves in the form of chronic irritability, depression, or a negative outlook.
-- Eleanor D. Payson, The Wizard of Oz and Other Narcissists, p. 83
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