The fantasy of the good family that Carol conjured for her is hard to resist -- a good family is something we all yearn for, something many of us didn't get. The desire for it is strong, and the possibility of getting it pulls us like a magnet. Ultimately, however, I was able to show Jan that if she didn't have the kind of family she wanted by this point in her life, she probably wasn't going to get it. Carol had painted a beautiful picture for her, but it wasn't real. You can't write a check for a thousand or a million or 10 million dollars and buy closeness, no matter what blackmailers might insist.
-- Susan Forward with Donna Frazier, Emotional Blackmail, p. 37